News Headlines From Obama's 2nd Term

Freepers' indulge in a bit of satire, and let their paranoid imaginations run wild!

Here are some choice samples:

The Obama Justice Department announced today that the last gun had been "pryed from the cold, dead hand" of the last Second Amendment agitator. The miscreant was clutching a homophobic Bible in her other hand.

Former State of Arizona Sealed Off

Obama Endorses Holder As Successor "The next time we happen to have an election".

Defense of Just Marriage Act Bans Non LGBT Unions

Obama Says New IRS Robin Hood Division Is "Not Socialism"

Mitt Romney accepts position as Obama’s Gay Marriage Czar

U.S. military shifts mission emphasis from armed conflict to environmental protection

Statue of Lenin to replace Lincoln’s at Memorial; site to be renamed People’s Memorial to Socialist Pioneers

Post presidential funeral procession race riot quickly squelched by National Guard and armed civilian volunteers.

MSNBC renamed to Pravda

The Phrase, "Who Is John Galt?" Outlawed As Hate Speech

In Interest of Fairness, Western Religious Practices Banned-Churches Siezed As State Property

Twelve Dollar Gasoline? Bicyclists Long for 'Good Old Days' of Eight Dollar-Per-Gallon Gas

New MSNBC Poll Shows Most Still Blame Bush for Poor Economy

Following China’s example, one child policy implemented in United States, with mandatory sterilization upon next health checkup for women of childbearing age. Democrat voters exempt.

Nursing home care costs plummet after Obamacare “final care” solution implemented.

Racist Asian-American who knows no official language complains of lack of English ballots

Advanced copy of his 2nd inaugural address:
We shall crush our enemies, see them driven before us, and hear the lamentations of their women ...

Shadowstrike isn't laughing!

I don’t scare easy, but this gave me the cold chills.