Freepers mellowing on the gays?

I'd seen the letter elsewhere on the internet, but didn't think to check Free Republic. Luckily, not one but two commenters found their take.

This letter from a father disowning his son for being gay is making the rounds on ther internet. What surprised me about Freepers' reactions, though was how mixed it was. Not that gays are evil and bad - they still are - but whether the Father looks good in all this. It's an subtle shift, but just compared to their naked hatred of all Muslims, cant tell Freepers see how that hating the gays is starting to be a loser.

But let us start with the haters. Often long-winded, since they're trying their best to defend the indefensible:

Casie knows the father was hurt, so the son should have tried being not so gay for a bit.

It doesn't take a lot to read between the lines and see a father that feels shattered with disappointment and fear. He will never get to meet his new daughter-in-law. He will never be Gramps or Paw-Paw to some wonderful little tyke. And he will always fear for his son's physical health and spiritual well-being.

Perhaps if this son was not so self absorbed and happy to wallow in his self pity and drama, he may have been able to feel his father's pain and attempt to bridge the gap... instead of flying his gay agenda flag on the back of his father's sincere letter.

Marcella knows all gays die of AIDS, so they must be shunned.

Three boys out of my son’s high school graduating class of a couple of hundred kids, were homosexual. All three died with AIDS. Their lives were gone in their early 20s. What a great lifestyle they had.

If I had a grown child who was homosexual, he/she could not come to my house. That child would have made a choice and I would make a choice.

Norm Lenhart has a long explanation, predicated on the assumption that gay people destroy their family by their mere gayness:

First, lets stipulate to a simple fact. ‘little Johnny’ has chosen to destroy his family because he prefers taking another man’s penis orally and analy. That his desire to fulfill his sexual desires and put them ahead of everything and everyone but himself...so he ‘can be who he is’ has accomplished what exactly?

Not only has he and others like him made the personal choice to cause chaos for sexual gratification is not the worst of it. The worst of it is that he and others KNOW that there will always be people out there who believe that everyone else must change and adapt their lives, beliefs et all to accommodate his oral and anal desires.

Period.

So by all means. Please continue helping little ‘johnny’ destroy more families and himself through making it easier for him to do so. And having had a ‘homosexual’ (when it could get her what she wanted) sister in law, I have some experience in the matter.

So the whole thing comes down to this. Is it right for normal people to accept this insanity only to get more of it when they do? Or is it right that people be held accountable for the choices they make?

mdmathis6 explains that sometimes only abandoning one's son to gayness can shock the son back to heterosexuality:

Sometime love demands we abandon erring ones, especially if such erring may threaten other innocent ones either as direct physical threats or indirectly thru influencing the innocents to commit sin themselves.

There is a time one must let go for the sake of one’s own spiritual integrity. One can mistake spiritual integrity for “wounded pride”, but “wounded pride” may also cause a parent or loved one to cling to an erring one to such an extent, that the erring one has no motivation to examine him or herself and to change those behaviors that are in error. “Tough love” maybe the only radical spiritual scalpel that may yet save the patient from him or her self!

Pontiac thinks unconditional love is liberal propaganda:

I disagree. I have three daughters and there is NOTHING they can do that would cause me to disown them. I love them unconditionally.

This unconditional love thing is another stupid Liberal idea foisted on the world in the sixties.

For your sake I hope your daughters never put you to the test.

It is true that a parent that raised their children to be good people will always WANT to lover their children but when your child has truly done terrible things to others, themselves and the parents it is only natural to hate the child for these terrible things that they have done.

Gayness - a terrible thing to others, themselves and the parent, I guess.

papertyger explains that disowning one's son ain't no biggie - it's just like a spanking!

His son needs help, not abandonment.

That's like saying an unruly child needs manners, not a spanking ....

ArrogantBustard also thinks disowning is the proper treatment for alcoholism or drug addiction:

Until the son recognizes that his sodomite lifestyle is evil and that he needs help, the son cannot be helped. In this respect, the sodomite is no different from the alcoholic or the drug addict.

dragonblustar is just a disownin' son of a bitch:

I’d have to disown my kids of they come out liberal or Muslim.

Freedom of thought is not for Freepers!

miss marmelstein knows some gay men, but can't stand the drama:

as someone who works in the theatre in NYC, I can tell you that the gay community is NOT nice and kind to each other. Once you are in the group, you have to be prepared for a lot of bile, insults and conformity. Individual gay men can be nice; but put them together at a party and you have a mixture of The Boys in the Band and feeding time at the zoo.

Okay, that's a lot of haters. But there were just as many Freepers who chose to redirect their hatred in a more personal direction -

OrangeHoof disowned his brother but not really and the brother was all sensitive about it and also don't disown people:

I had to write a similar letter to my younger brother when he decided to announce he was gay. I tried not to be harsh or to cut off all communication but I did make clear what scripture had to say and advise him not to "come out" around my sister and her children.

He doesn't speak to us much but I did help fly him to my mother's funeral and pay for his lodging and meals so surely he realizes I am not cutting him off however I think many gays become hypersensitive to slights and interpret even minor conflicts or silence as "hate" when it isn't so. It's as if they can't wait to find any confirmation of "hate" from straights as somehow justification for their own nastiness and persecution complex.

My advice to anyone who is convinced by faith that homosexuality is wrong and yet must deal with a family member who comes out is to a) stand firm in what Scripture says but b) understand that we are all sinners and do your best to accept the fallen without embracing their lifestyle.

RIghtwardHo goes all Pontious Pilate:

I refuse to judge someone else’s family.

Ezekiel attacks the son for releasing the letter:

What I know is that this "James" decided to make public a private letter, while providing only his side of this story. Conveniently for James, this makes his father look like a very bad man, a real homophobe just like that intolerant Cathy character.

"James" has a need to pit the whole world against his father with this one-sided tale of woe.

Therefore, I don't trust this "James". He comes off as a manipulative, deceptive drama queen.

TigerClaws refuses to believe the father exists:

Fake letter from drama queen seeking sympathy for political gain.

varyouga didn't read all the assholes above him on the thread, I guess:

A father that cares enough about his son to be in his life (rare these days) and write a letter (even more rare these days) would have a face-to-face with him first.

I only see two possibilities:

-The letter is completely fake.

-The letter came after a long time of instigating or rubbing it in for not accepting his lifestyle. Always bringing it up, bringing ‘boyfriends’ over(probably why he's banned from the house), showing pictures of how ‘happy’ he is at ‘gay’ getaways/parades, etc. I'm in NYC and know good number of people in the ‘community’. This is pretty typical when such a situation occurs.

I personally don't have a problem with them as long as they keep it private and, IMO , the government should not be involved in any marriage at all

Finally, AD from SpringBay gets a lot of attaboys for this comment:

Sex is something a person has, it is not who they are. This entire problem with sexuality as identity should be understood as a mental illness.

Freepers would seem to prefer to fight against straw versions of gay people who have no jobs or lives beyond constant buttsex. I guess.

It's always a good sign when Freepers pick their battles and choose to fight in fantasy land.